Webinar presenter Marc Hildebrand answered a number of your questions after his presentation, The Secret behind Getting into Incredible Shape while Working Our Crazy Careers. Here are just a few of his responses.
Audience Question: Can you say one more time of the name of your Podcast is?
Marc Hildebrand: Yes, it’s the Leo Family Fitness Podcast. And those are like, really my three pillars. Number one is our career. Number two is our family, and number three is our physical, mental, and emotional health and fitness. that’s how I Break down the podcast.
Audience Question: And what platforms are you on?
Marc Hildebrand: Everywhere. If you don’t have a podcast platform, if you go to leofamilyfitness.com, I have a built-in integrated podcast platform, but most people have some type of podcast app like apple podcasts or Spotify.
Host: Got it. That’s wonderful. Yeah, I end up using Spotify for most of mine as well
Audience Question: Right after we had some of those challenges you said something that we’d like you to repeat, and it was external something, external something as a reflection of the internal growth. Can you remind us what that was?
Marc Hildebrand: Yeah. Your external results are always a reflection of your inner growth. A lot of times, we want to focus on the outside, and what we don’t realize is the changes first happen inside. When the changes happen inside the outside will catch up. But when you’re focused on the external ones, which is what most people try and do when they try and lose weight, they’re trying to fix the outside. They don’t realize they have to grow internally. And when they can grow into the type of person that can be at that weight, it will just naturally happen. The outside will change, but always focus on that inner growth.
Audience Question: What books or other podcasts other than your own, do you recommend? I know that you had a few showing on that page. But what are some of your favorite books?
Marc Hildebrand: That’s a great question. So, I would ask her what she is looking to grow in right now, like what area? One of the things you brought up earlier, Aaron, is forcing books. So, I love to like to be the collector of possible books. However, when I start reading them, or I learn a little bit about them, I realized that not every book is for every season of my life. So, a lot of the ones that I focus on… Like Extreme Ownership by Jocko Willink and Leif Babin. that is really good if you’re looking to take ownership of leadership in your life, whether it’s you leading other people, but most importantly, leading yourself. Atomic Habits is a great one from James Clear. If you’re looking to just like develop better habits in your life, he’s got both the science and the mindset and the proper tactics on how to develop those. There are a couple of other books that I don’t have pinned here because they have a little bit of offensive language. But they are by Gary John Bishop. Gary John Bishop is somebody who is very aggressive. But he talks a lot about, like, limiting beliefs and really self-sabotage. And so, if you find that you’re the type of person that sabotage your results your like, literally talk yourself out of doing everything, then picking up when one of Gary John Bishop’s books will be incredible. And so, it really, there are so many different books that I can share here. But if you find, like, let’s say, a specific area that you’re looking to grow in, that’s where you want to like, pick up a book that’s related to that, not just something, because somebody else read it.
Audience Question: I find that the success you’ve had with Masterminds is amazing and I’ve got to say somewhat unique. Can you talk a little bit about Masterminds for those that aren’t familiar with it and maybe what platforms you used? How you’ve assembled a group of like-minded folks, and so on and so forth.
Marc Hildebrand: Yeah, for sure, for sure. This is a great question. I love this.
So, Masterminds are a collection of people who have the same similar values, and they’re looking to grow. They’re looking to become better. It’s usually led by either a coach or some type of instructor, who’s a few steps ahead of everybody. It’s a way of getting together and growing together. We get on Zoom, and we basically share different strategies, tactics, and mindsets a lot of what we talked about here today. One of those things would be something that I would talk about and bring up on one of the calls, and then I would give them the tactics in order how to, how to be consistent with it based off of not only what I’ve learned, but also what I’ve, what I’ve helped other people learn. And so basically the Mastermind is you taking like total extreme ownership of who you’re hanging out with the most and then you put yourself in that environment as often as possible. There are Masterminds on Facebook, there are Masterminds everywhere. And if you find one, if you’re like, “Hey, I want to grow like let’s say with my business,” then you would find something related to business and you could create your own by the way. It just takes a lot of time and energy because you got to make sure that you don’t have any. I don’t know how to say it. You don’t have any Debbie Downers in there and I’m sorry if there’s any Debbie’s who are here, but anybody who really pulls the group down, anybody who’s like the naysayer, because that is very easy to get everybody else to get on that same wavelength. So, really, it’s just a surrounding of, like, people who are on the same level as you who are heading in that direction, who are going to push each other to grow. And then also being led by somebody who’s a few steps ahead of you. What’s crazy about this is, everybody thinks it’s just something that’s happened recently. However, you look, if you look into thinking, Think and Grow Rich from Napoleon Hill, which was written in the 1940s, this is what they did. He would like Mastermind with people who were like millionaires back then. And what they would do is, they would level each other up by sharing not only the secrets, the strategies, and the tactics, but also the positivity, and when you’re around other people who are making it look easy, it just seems so much easier for you. It’s like that belief of like, “Wow, this is possible for me too.” And so, for me, I decided I was going to spin-off and create my own Mastermind because I had learned so much through my process of growing for me that I wanted to share it with other people. And so that’s what I did, and I have to be very particular about who I add in there because I want to make sure that I continue to level everybody else up. You can look anywhere. You can listen to so many different podcasts, you’ll hear them talking about Masterminds and just focusing on somebody who has the same values as you, who are looking to grow in the same areas as you, who’s a few steps ahead of you, fully plugin to that. Masterminds are usually not free, they’re usually a paid resource that you have to plug into. The best stuff in life is a paid resource, because not only do you have that accountability, but you have skin in the game, right? Otherwise, if that were the case, you could just Google what the best nutrition plan would be and we’d all be in the best shape, right? So, finding something that is, that resonates with you, that has those members that are similar to like you, who have the same values, is what will help you. Just making sure that you’re surrounding yourself with the right people.
Host: I wanted to share this amazing tip from Mary that she shared earlier. She suggested that you reach out to your local library and they have audiobooks that are available to patrons at the library, and you can use different apps like Overdrive and Libby. A wonderful way to get access to audiobooks that can be kind of expensive to keep if you go through them rapidly. So, really, really great suggestion there. Mary, Thank you so much.
Marc Hildebrand: That is a really great suggestion and let me throw one more suggestion on you. So, if you guys find an audiobook and it’s like “Man, like this book speaks to my soul, it is just like breathing belief and getting me to show up.” You don’t need a new one. Listen to that same one over and over and over again. One of my mentors listens to the same book on repeat. It’s from Grant Cardone, The 10X Rule. Because every time he listens to it, he gets fueled, he’s on fire. You don’t have to recreate the wheel guys if you find something that you’re, like, this audiobook was incredible. You don’t have to go out and find another one. Keep reading that same one. And it’s crazy because for an audiobook, every time you listen to it, you listen to it with a new set of ears. Because you’ve grown through it the last time. I can’t tell you how many times I’ve read a book, I mean, I’ve read like Extreme Ownership, like seven times. And every time, I’m like, “Well, I didn’t see this part of it in here last time,” and it’s because I was reading it with a different set of eyes. I was at a different level, and when you read that, you level up, you get to re-listen to it or reread it. You get even more from it, and then it reminds you because oftentimes, we need to be reminded more than we need to learn new things. And so don’t just think that you have to go out and buy all of these books. Sometimes just pick one, and just fully commit to it, and, like, read it, over and over again, until it becomes a part of you, and then move on to something else.
Host: Such fantastic advice, Brendon Burchard’s Motivation Manifesto is what I have on repeat on my phones.
Audience Question: You mentioned that you and your wife went down on this journey together, so can you talk a little bit about her journey? Did she join her own Mastermind group? How did she get kind of the surround yourself by those five people that helped influence her?
Marc Hildebrand: That is awesome. That is a great question. So, yes. Before I started to take full control over my health, I was trying to push her, trying to get her to show up. She wanted to lose some weight. She wanted to feel better. She had gained 35 pounds after our second daughter, and that was never the way. And so, what I started to do is, after reading my second book, the 21 Irrefutable Laws of Leadership, he talks a lot about modeling the behavior that you want to see in others. And so, I just model the behavior, and I’m like, ”Hey, you know what, I would love it if we could spend some more time together. And if we’re working out, and I can just talk to you and look over it, like, that would be awesome. If not, that’s totally cool. But I’m going to be over here working out and if you want to join me, please do.” And she took that is like, “You know what, I wouldn’t mind doing that.” And so, she started to work out with me, started to come along the journey with me, and of course, me being a police officer, a lot of the police officers that I was surrounding myself with were people who also took their family seriously. And so, they a lot of them had wives and so my wife was like, you know what, maybe I can connect with some of them. So, she started to coach some of the wives as well. Since then, we have actually combined and teamed up. Because, what we found is, like, when we are inside of our Mastermind, it’s good to hear from my angle, but it’s even better sometimes to hear from hers. Because, like, it is so important to keep your spouse a part of the program and not just make it be like something that you’re off doing on your own, but also to get their feedback too. And I can’t tell you how many times that has been just an eye-opener for me because, I’m the Law Enforcement Officer, right? And there are so many things that she experiences because of my career. Because of the person that I’ve become because of my career. That like, it’s just an eye-opening thing to me where I’m like, “You know what? I don’t like that. I want to change that, too.” And so, it’s a way of us kind of like teaming up to help all of the families out there, not just police officers, but also in anyone in the first responder support field, from getting both themselves and their significant other involved. And then, as a result of that, she just kept following and modeling the behavior that I was doing. And it was never me pushing her, telling her what to do or anything like that because we know how that works, right? When we tell our significant others what to do, that doesn’t work, but modeling the behavior is the best thing that you can ever do.
Audience Question: So, what do you do if you have to work with a Debbie Downer?
Marc Hildebrand: Ooh, that’s a great one. So, here’s the thing, it’s kind of funny. positivity usually pushes away negativity, or it brings the person up to you. So, here’s the thing. I would sometimes take that as a challenge. What I would do is I would say, okay, listen, I’m going to be working with this person who’s like, always negative, who’s always, just like. We call them slugs. They’re always just trying to hide. Not taking their area, taking their radio calls. And I would be like, “What can I do to make this person just step it up today?” And so, I would like, make it a little bit of a fun challenge, because I love challenges and I would see like, what I could do to make a positive impact on them and what’s funny is, like, more often than not, they started to have fun doing that stuff. They started to get into it and it’s kind of like rubbed off on them. And like when you’re conscious of this, the most important thing is awareness. All right? When you are aware that this is happening, that you’re hanging out with somebody like that, you’re going to ask powerful, amazing questions, like the one you just asked. Because you’re like, “Okay, how might I make this a positive experience anyway?” And when you ask that question, you’re going to be presented with different answers, and you can take it as a challenge. And of course, you can make sure that you’re hanging out with more positivity that day, maybe reading a little bit more, maybe listening to an audiobook. I don’t know, maybe putting on this presentation, the replay with them in the background. I mean, anything that you can do. There are so many different ways that you can inspire, and motivate them, and when you start looking at it that way and take it like a challenge, it’s just like a great opportunity for you to make an impact, Not just in yourself, but in other people too.
Audience Question: How can single parents and students that already have a positive mindset find more time to develop these positive habits?
Marc Hildebrand: Okay, so, I could go on for 13 years for this question. I love this question so much. Because you’re seeking the answers, right? I have a person in my Mastermind team. She is an amazing mom of four, she is also single. She’s also full-time in our field, and she has been able to find the time based off of some of the coaching that I’ve helped her with. So, let me kind of break down just really quick kind of the mindset behind time management, okay? Everybody wants the tactics like, hey, show me what I need to do, where I can, like, move it into, and all that kind of stuff. But that’s not where you start when it comes to time management. It’s the mindset. So, the mindset around time management is some things matter more than others. Some things matter more than others. There’s this principle. It’s called the Pareto Principle, and it says it’s the 80-20 rule, okay? What it says is 20% of the activity that you take throughout the day produces 80% of the results that you get in your life. The 80% of the things that you do only produce the other 20% of stuff. So basically, what this says is, most of the stuff that you’re doing is not actually moving the needle a lot. It kind of tricks us into thinking, like, “Oh, hey, we’re heading in the right direction,” but in reality, if we focus on the 20% of things that we did, make sure we did that with excellence, and either eliminated or outsource that other 80%. We would be able to show up better, not only for ourselves but for our family. Let me give an example of the 80-20 rule because this happens everywhere, right? I’d like to get this one with family. So, 80% of the time that you spend with your kids is, there are, you know, they’re around on their iPad or their Kindle. You guys are watching TV in the same room. You know, you’re cooking food. You’re doing the laundry all of these times where we’re like, in the vicinity. And we think that that means that we’re good parents, it doesn’t actually make us good parents. I mean, it’s good that we’re around, right? But that’s not actually where the connection is 20% of the time is when you turn off all electronics, you sit down, you have a board game. You get to go on a walk with them, you talk about how their day is. You ask them powerful questions, like, here’s a great one, guys. Sit down today, and I want you to ask your significant other, your kids this, “What made you smile today?” Ask them that question. There’s a deeper connection than, “Hey, how was your day?” You ask them that question, they’re also going to be focused on the positive. Now, the reason why I say this is because, when it comes to our time management, what we think is that we have to do more. That’s not the mindset around time management. The mindset is you got to do less. You got to figure out what that 20% of the activities that you’re taking, that are producing the most results in your life, and you got to double down on that. And then you got to take that other 80% and say, how can I outsource it, or how can I eliminate it? And it’s hard at the moment, because you’re like, “No, I have to keep doing these things. These things are vital, I need it.” But in reality, if you look at that and you actually remove it, you will never even notice that it wasn’t there anymore. So, what I do is, I help people identify what that 20% of the activities are that produces 80% of the results in their life, and then we track it. So, we have a tracker that you follow to make sure that you’re showing up and doing those things because our brains are primitive brains kind of trying to trick us into thinking that, “Oh, no, we got to go back to the way that we were. We’re missing all of these things.” But in reality, if you understand that some things matter more than others, then you can make a determination on what things you want to promote and do, and which things you want to eliminate or outsource, and you can get to them later if you have time. But if you focus on just the most important stuff, not only will your life be extremely incredible, but you’ll also have all the time that you need to exercise. You’ll be creative, right? For me, quick example, one of the things that, that I was doing is, I tried a program called the 75 Hard, where you have to do two workouts today, one in the morning and one later in the afternoon. And my initial thought was like, that’s going to take a lot of time for my family. And instead, I’m like, you know what? Actually, going on a walk with my kids, and doing it like one kid at a time, which would be a great time to like, not only ask them great questions but have a great opportunity to connect. So instead, what I’m going to do is I’m going to tell them, Hey, guys, I’m doing the 75 hard later and each day. I’m going to take either my son, my daughter, or my wife, only one of them at a time, so we can really connect. And I got them actually fighting over who’s going to go on a walk with me because I get to solve both those problems I get to exercise. And I get to connect with them on a deep level. And so, every day, every morning, my daughter’s like, she’s talking to my son, “Hey, can I go on a walk today? I’ll give you some of my extra whatever.” And it’s just funny how that like goes to play, because I got creative with it, and I realized that some things matter more than others. I hope that answers your question. There’s just so much more there on that loaded question, but just figure out what that 20% of the activities are that produce 80% of the results in your life, keep doing those and eliminate or outsource the others.
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